of lovers, pigs, and subpoenas

I’d say you’re a swine, you hissed,

But I don’t want to be sued by a pig.

As if a pig shies away from rutting, over-eating

And the occasional innings of mud-enhanced horseplay.

Still, if I have caused offense to a soul,

Be it porcine or otherwise, my deepest, humblest apologies.


I should say, in my defense, that none among us could truly be

The dazzling, dashing version of ourselves we put out

For inspection in early days.  The peacock, once you get to know him,

Is simply a noisome, foul-tempered bird

Ill-smelling and likely to nip the very tip off a finger

Once he folds his plumage, the feathers having served their purpose.


Let me reiterate, then, what pig and princess know full well;

Some days, we are the foul, fornicating beast in the slop

While on others we offer glimpses of our best, finest, Platonic selves.

Mostly, we plod on in bewilderment somewhere in the middle.

I would submit that my dear pre-bacon brethren

Would not find by behavior defamatory;

Indeed, should push come to shove,

I would hope they would file

An amicus curiae on behalf of my defense.


One thought on “of lovers, pigs, and subpoenas

  1. I like your writing style, sometimes it throws me off and I go “this should have been one dense paragraph per stanza”, but then the airiness of it kind of makes sense.

    Also, I like how there’s no aggression in the piece, just a factual observation…

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